Motherhood started like boot camp for me and when things got better after a year, I thought I could finally cruise through parenting. Boy! Was I wrong?! I’ve had to revise my expectations again and again and AGAIN!  

You see I have a quirky son. Most times he is “normal” but certain other times, not so. If you have the time you can read about it here, here and here.

Most recently we discovered that he could possibly be suffering some hearing loss in his left ear which may require a hearing aid. While 70 percent of me has come to terms with this, 30 percent of me is still struggling. It’s hard news to hear. My dream of a “perfect” boy is no longer intact. Part of me is grieving for that loss. 

Trust me, I know there are people who are worse off than I am. Trust me, I am thankful that he can still lead a “normal” life. I KNOW. Yet the fact remains that I am only human. I am a normal mommy. I need to grieve my “loss”. Then and only then can I move on, accept it fully and bring up my son as best as I can (with lots of grace from God of course!). 

Katherine from Raising Five wrote a very, very beautiful post today on how we should let go of our dreams and embrace our children (and parenting and our husbands) for who they are. If you’ve not been to her blog, you have to TODAY! Like NOW!

These thoughts ministered to me this week as I struggle… God didn’t make a mistake creating my special son. HE not only chose Hubby-jr to be my son, HE chose ME to be his mother. HE will not lead me where HIS grace will not keep me. 

And I found this verse that spoke to me of HIS love for little children and their mommies. 

Isaiah 40:11 (NKJV)
He will feed His flock like a shepherd; He will gather the lambs with His arm, And carry them in His bosom, And gently lead those who are with young.

Motherhood is extremely tough (as I’m finding out and am sure will continue to find out) but as Katherine puts it, we will get through it.


4 Responses to “Motherhood”

  1. katherine@raisingfive Says:

    That is one of my favorite pictures of God’s loving care. He will keep your precious boy and carry him, but will gently lead YOU as you do your best as his mother. What a comfort. Thank you for sharing your journey – it’s not the easy stuff that shapes us, it’s the tough stuff that forces us to our knees and makes us rely on Him completely. Yes, you will get through this. I’m confident of that.


  2. xboxwife Says:

    I will be praying for you, your husband, and your son during this time. You have very eloquently written what every one of us would be feeling given the same situation. You are so right when you say that God did not make a mistake creating your special son.

    In Psalm 139:13-14, it states, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

    And in Jeremiah 29:11, it states, “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'”

    Take comfort and hope from those verses, and keep in mind what you have already said for yourself – God chose YOU to be him mommy. He must think that you are very special!

  3. mamabliss Says:

    I feel for you dear… and here’s my devotion today that I find it apt to share it with you… I hope it’ll be able to bring you some encouragement and comfort…

    “That He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man” – Eph 3:16

    “And if my heart and flesh are weak
    To bear an untried pain,
    The bruised reed He will not break,
    But strengthen and sustain”


  4. Music to My Ears « Mommy-fied Says:

    […] out that my son has mild hearing loss in his right ear was difficult for me. And after some “grieving” I’ve come to terms with it. I no longer quietly wish somewhere in a corner of my heart that […]

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