I swear I think I should be institutionalised. Days when I turn into Mr. Hyde simply because it is the “time of the month”. It’s not something I’m imagining or conjuring. I really turn Ug-Ly.
Not quite physically. None of my facial characteristics change, well, not structurally anyway. But I’m sure I look worn out, haggard and downright grouchy. Rather, what I mean is, suddenly one morning I wake up feeling like a truck just ran over me and I’m super duper uptight for the rest of the day.
Whatever patience I have in the first place (not much) goes entirely out of the window (and then some!) Innocent mistakes by my two lovely children drive me absolutely nuts. And to their detriment I sometimes lose it and shout at them. After shouting, I see their eyes swelling with tears and I sink deep (I mean d-e-e-p, deep) into guilt. I try to explain to them their mistake(s), then I apologise for overreacting, and then I kiss them and tell them I love them incessantly. Then I pray in my heart that there’ll be no permanent emotional damage. Drama huh? This drama will repeat itself a few times before the “days” are over. You have no idea the kind of emotional roller coaster I go through during these “times”.
Hubby knows my cycles by now and can tell from the signs when the “season” is about to arrive. The most obvious one being, “honey, I feel fat. Am I fat?” So he knows how to tip toe around me and keep the kids at bay. But when he’s at work… sigh.
How do I explain to my kids that it’s the time of the month? How do I explain that once every month mommy’s not quite mommy but it’s just for a few days? Sigh… Hmm… perhaps there should be an institution just for that.
P/S: This is not my first post (and probably not the last) on PMS, this is. Seriously, it is a problem and yes I’m going through it. Duh!