Why Do Stay Home Moms Have No Time?

A friend shared an article on Facebook and I had to, HAD to post it here. All stay home moms (especially those with kids 5 and below and no domestic helper) will be screaming, “YES! YES! YES!!!” After reading it. And if you are not a stay home mom or a mom with young kids you should read it too. It’ll help you get us moms a little better as it fabulously captured a day (more like everyday) in a life of a mom.

Without further ado, please click here.

Writing again, at last

Has it only been more than 2 months since I last wrote? Somehow it seems like decades ago to me. Yes in part it is because I enjoy writing and have missed doing so but mainly because SO much has happened during that time. 

In early February 2010, I brought Hubby-jr to a speech therapist for an assessment. Why? Well, even though I was hoping – hoping so badly I almost convinced myself Hubby-jr was doing alright – my gut told me he wasn’t. I knew in my gut that he wasn’t socialising or expressing himself as well as his peers and in a sea of primary school students it became more obvious. So I brought him for a speech assessment just in case (I was still hoping my gut was wrong). 

As it turned out, he not only needed to start speech therapy again (weekly for at least a year) I was also advised to send him for an occupational therapy check. Which we (hubby and I) did and bingo, he needed weekly occupational therapy as well. Apparently my son has sensory issues as well, perhaps due to his hearing problem (hard of hearing in his right ear). He has… here goes… vestibular and proprioceptive sensory issues. If you’re going WHAT?! Yup, sensory integration was a whole new world to me too. I’ll try to elaborate more in my next post. Promise. But for now, you’re stuck with just the jargons as I’m writing an as brief as possible update. 

At the same time I also came across some blogs and articles about children with mild to moderate hearing loss. It made me question if Hubby-jr seriously needed a hearing aid. So I emailed his audiologist and asked for a review of his records and asked for a recommendation. Guess what? They called me and said… yes, with his hearing profile his right ear should be fitted with a hearing aid! So my son has been wearing a hearing aid since 30 March 2010. Thankfully he adjusted to it very well right from get go and he told me it helps him hear better in school. 

So there, that is all (well not ALL but the more significant events) that’s happened over here in my home since I last posted. 

I battled through a wide spectrum of emotions as each news came. It has not been easy or painless. I grappled with God and tears accompanied quite a number of my prayers. But through it all I could see His faithfulness and feel His love. I may elaborate in my future posts. 

These days, I am hopeful (in the Lord) and… plain exhausted at the end of most days. Besides bringing him for the therapy sessions, I have to do follow up exercises (speech AND occupational) at home with him as much as I can. On top of that I’ve to help him with school work (homework, spelling). Not forgetting I DO have another child who still needs a fair amount of my attention. Yes, there’s also laundry, dinners to prepare… 

But by the grace of God I am coping, some days rather well and some days, not. All in all a whole lot better than I expected. I am learning to let go and let God. He is the source of my strength. 

Isa 40:28-31

28 Do you not know?
       Have you not heard?
       The LORD is the everlasting God,
       the Creator of the ends of the earth.
       He will not grow tired or weary,
       and his understanding no one can fathom.

 29 He gives strength to the weary
       and increases the power of the weak.

 30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
       and young men stumble and fall;

 31 but those who hope in the LORD
       will renew their strength.
       They will soar on wings like eagles;
       they will run and not grow weary,
       they will walk and not be faint.

Master

Now that Hubby-jr talks a whole lot more we’ve had some pretty interesting conversations. Here’s one of them.

“Am I your master?” Hubby-jr asked.

“No! Jesus is my master.” I answered frowning. What gall?! As I wondered how my son came to harbour such notions of grandeur. Huff.

“Jesus is my master too,” said my son and I warmed up with a smile but was still a little puzzled.

He proceeded to ask, “am I Master Tan?” (His surname is Tan)

Aaahhhh… a big grin formed across my face as the light bulb switched on in my head. His current favourite DVD movie then (a few weeks ago) was Kungfu Panda. And in that show there is the character, Master Shifu who is Kungfu Panda’s master.

“Yes, you are Master Tan.” It is the culture here to address little boys, Master and little girls, Miss.

I continued to elaborate, “you are Master Tan just like daddy is Mister Tan but that doesn’t make you my master. That is a different meaning of master…”

But I couldn’t help but wonder if he knew he had stumbled upon the truth, that he and his little sister are my “masters”. The ones I serve and labour for. Everyday.

Conversations with Little Missy

The first week my kids started school

Me: Can mommy go to work?

(It was one of “those” mornings where I just wanted to “run away” to formal employment.)

LM: No, cannot. Not now. Mommy must grow bigger and bigger first, then mommy can follow daddy to work. Not now. Next time, ok?

(I’ve often told her she can’t do certain things until she’s grown up, i.e. after she’s grown bigger and bigger. I usually repeat “bigger” with added emphasis just so she gets that it’ll be sometime before she gets to use makeup or drink coffee.)

Two days ago in a (get this) cubicle in a loo in a shopping centre! 

LM: Mommy is so..o tall.

Me: I’m tall?! (Hey, I don’t get to hear this much if any at all)

LM: Yes, mommy is so tall now. You can work now.

Me: I’m tall enough to work now?

LM: Yes.

A New Year, A New Era

In December last year…

I packed away Little Missy’s playpen, the one she has slept in since she was born. The same one Hubby-jr slept in. Little Missy now has her own bed. Unlike my firstborn, she was so thrilled to finally have her own bed, just like kor-kor (big brother in Cantonese).

lmbed

I packed away a sturdy stroller/pram. The wheels are so worn out, they have “smoothened” out. The stroller has well served its life. Both my kids used it from the day they were born. We had endless walks, shopping trips, visits to the  playground, visits to playdates with it. Now my kids walk with me. I still have a lightweight stroller for longer outings such as going to the zoo. But we’d probably give that away in a year’s time.

I packed away lots of baby toys too.

Way before December, I packed away milk bottles, baby monitor and gave away lots of baby clothes, shoes and stuff.

Babydom is over. Finito. Sigh.

At the turn of the year, my dear Little Missy started playgroup. Her first tiny step into the world of “formal” education. 

A new era is here.

AND as if I needed this fact to be hammered into my thick skull, my firstborn, Hubby-jr, dropped his first milk tooth a day after New Year’s! He is only 5 and half! He did not fall or got hit, his bottom front tooth just loosened and fell. For some strange reason, he was absolutely thrilled!

hjtooth

I on the other hand was far from thrilled. This my friends, to me marks the coming of the end of his preschool years. Next year, sniff, my once upon a time baby son is entering primary (junior) school. Yikes. But I still have one more year to get there… ONE whole year. I’ll cross that bridge then. And ONLY then.

Mothers Dealing With Discouragement

Sometimes I get so discouraged with the way the kids are acting or the way the house looks. I feel like I’m doing the best I can, but it’s not good enough. My husband tries to help, but I just feel worse. What can I do? Click here to read more (if the link doesn’t bring you to the article, go here to download a copy I saved as a word document). 

Its an article I found over at FamilyLife.com

P/S: It has great tips for husbands too.

What have I been doing?

Oh dear, I just realised that I have not posted anything for the last 3 weeks. Pardon moi. My parents were down for two and half weeks (they left 2 days ago, sniff) and I was busy doing stuff I couldn’t do on my own. Stuff like…

  • Watching a Hong Kong cantonese drama (not recommended, highly addictive).
  • Reading. I discovered Nevada Barr books and I love them. An investigative series of a park ranger named Anna Pigeon.
  • Some house cleaning, i.e. throwing lots of accumulated junk.
  • Spending a day or two downtown and having lunch date with hubby.
  • Spending time with my parents. AND
  • Napping or just plain vegetating.

It was BLISSFUL. Did I mention I LOVE my parents and I LOVE it when they visit? *innocent smile and blink-blink*

Well I’m back blogging but probably just once a week cause I’d still like to do some of the stuff above, albeit to a lesser degree. Nonetheless I hope you’ll continue to drop by.

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